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a ghost.. a real ghost.. has no need to die.. what is he except a being without access to the universe that he has not yet managed to forget?
~ randall jarrell

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In limbo
rows of never opened doors:
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all rights reserved..

ghost stories
(blood & butterflies..)

  • these are excerpts from the book toxic & i wrote about our childhood... it's called 'brenda was here'.. let me know what you think/comments? p.s. stories here are non fiction/true. (privately hosted ~ if you're interested in reading this just ask:)


ghost toy catalogue

  • spookytown
    an inventory of toys & collectibles vintage & new including toxic's toys, toxic's library & halloweeniana..

    ~ copyright 2011 all rights reserved
Cherrytreemoon
the friendlyghost album ~ welcome to my photo album..
we live in wonderland.. :)
i hope you enjoy me & my guys & kitties, the places we go & things we enjoy..
~ copyright 2008 all rights reserved
Beloved sleep
cemeteria album ~
remember me as you pass by.. as you are now so once was i.. as i am now so you will be.. prepare for death and follow me..
~ copyright 2008 all rights reserved
Scandalous
family tree album ~
this addition to the cemeteria album is especially for my own lost loved ones..
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a POEtry reading...

elliott smith & portland

Pdx
portland haunts album ~
is mr smith haunting portland? come see snaps of elliott smith landmarks & other local spots..
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the library..

Thingsbehindthesun
things behind the sun (journals)
Razorblades
a mouthfull of razorblades (journals)
www.flickr.com
ghost at the gate's items Go to ghost at the gate's photostream
Laurelhurst trees
january trees album ~
january trees ~ winter shows her bones.. the tree is the psyche, the spirit, the whole self.. our inner world..
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vintage socal, birthdays & halloweens..
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Enter
halloween mini album ~
~ copyright 2015 all rights reserved
Bren alice patreon
ghost pix album ~ rpg videogame screenshots, lol kitties & all kinds of goodies.. (use a pc or laptop to hear my game mix here)

home to oblivion..


  • ok i need a whole section just for elder scrolls~oblivion 'cause i'm playing it and loving it way too much right now.. i am so beautifully lost here living as a vampire & i'm never coming back.
    later ~ 430 hours of gameplay all as a vampire & now i'm stuck in limbo in the deadly glitch.. noooo!!
    update: i'm on the methadone of rpgs for my oblivion withdrawls, it's predecessor morrowind ~ the game of the year edition.. these are now my All-Time favorite rpgs, above all others..
    NEW ELDER SCROLLS!!
    SKYRIM!! 11/11/11!! DAWNGUARD DLC!!
    & more dlc to come!
    the awful tyranny of the sun shall end..

  • come into oblivion with me & tour my homes.. (note: vampirism has changed my appearance & my invisibility is due to stealth..)

  • so many ways to die..

  • realms of madness..

  • a friend in highcross town..

  • bonus morrowind footage..

  • welcome to skyrim..

ghost closet...

haunted home movies..

ghost charity

ghost space

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« from the limbo of lunary souls | Main | some thoughts on adult insecure attachment.. »

April 15, 2014

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ghost

song for the day is from midlake ~

rulers, ruling all things

i have been cruel & kind
without knowing
i fell into silence
overwhelmed by these days
for i have been shown empty rulers
ruling all things
thinking the world was mine
to lay hold of
i breathed in
the promise of maiden & man
but each had their own illusions
to hold onto
i only want
to be left to my own ways
the rulers have won
leaving all things undone
i've stood in awe
of the whole creation
gathered among them is
the morning giving all its rest
thinking the world was mine
to be lost in
i ran with the freedom
& sang in between
for i had the path of wonder
there before me
i only want
to be left to my own ways
the rulers have won
leaving all things undone
i've stood in awe of
the whole creation
gathered among them was
the morning giving all its rest
i only want to be left to
my own ways..

ghost

midlake again ~

i untied all the ropelines
i gathered our things
& placed them beside me
you never arrived
& i got worried
you never arrived
& i was troubled
but you were bound to leave
& so i crumbled
you should steer
the seats are warm
on this boat
come on & hurry
move your feet
down the shore
that winter had a hold on
& we'll pass by
for the last time
we'll pass by
for the last time..

h. lecter

our scars have the power to remind us that the past was real.. ~ h. lecter

ghost

school shooting today at the high school where my son graduated not so long ago.. parents & students all reuniting in our local fred meyer supermarket parking lot, unbelievable.. what is it going to take before we have better gun control laws?

ghost

http://boundaryninjatales.com/2011/10/14/disorganized-attachment-or-why-you-think-youre-crazy-but-really-arent/

really good talk here regarding the often excruciating experience of therapy for those of us who are insecurely attached..

ghost

roses are dead
violets are food
i am insane
& i am too..

http://www.brensgumbyland.com/images/ghosthide.png

ghost

when i look at how people really are i am relieved to count myself among the freaks & outcasts..
remember the dolly for sue, not all the misfits are apparent..

http://www.brensgumbyland.com/images/misfitdolly.jpg

ghost

hey it's halloween..

seawolf again ~

dear fellow traveler
under the moon
i saw you standin' in the shadows
& your eyes were blue
you put your hand out
opened the door
you said come with me boy
i want to show you something more
you spoke my language
& touched my limbs
it wasn't difficult to pull me
from myself again
& in our travels
we found a rose
you held it like a mirror
showing me the life i chose
& i'll return to my beautiful city
black skies changed into blue
& my love is so wise & so pretty
but some nights i still
dream of you..
dear fellow traveler
under the moon
i think i'm growing weary
& i'm hopin' you'll come soon
& if i see you in clean new clothes
i hope you'll hold the mirror up
to show me what i chose
& i'll return to my beautiful city
black skies changed into blue
& though my love is so wise & so pretty
some nights i'll still
dream of you..
& i know you're out there
in the shadows
i know you're out there
in the shadows
i know you're out there
in the shadows..
dear fellow traveler
underneath the moon..

bren

http://brensgumbyland.com/halloween%20house.html

& toxic

ghost

we've been hit here in portland with our first snow & ice of the season with fierce east winds from the gorge blowing the tall fir trees surrounding our house. at night i pray for our trees the way i do for my kitties & loved ones..

new projects from toxic ~
http://brensgumbyland.com/hiding%20places.html

http://brensgumbyland.com/autumn%20butterfly.html

ghost

winter is here & although i love the cold & i'm accustomed to my solitary life with just my guys & kitties, this time the isolation is feeling rather intense. it's too freezing to venture out in the east wind, even the toyroom downstairs is too cold to spend much time in. i have sick & fragile old lady kitties to take care of & to keep warm. i'm not so different from them.. i have no other connections.

the trees are swaying..

http://www.brensgumbyland.com/images/fir.png

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lost & found toys

Around the bend album main
visit my around the bend album (sound up) photos by ghost 2019 all rights reserved

cat girl

  • xx xx xx be wild.. xx xx xx

a handful of applecores a mouthful of razorblades

  • i am friendly ~ but i have edges..
  • seeing is deceiving..
  • $@x!^&*#%!/
  • love bites.
  • life sucks.
  • "but i don't want to go among mad people" Alice remarked.
    "oh, you can't help that," said the Cat:
    "we're all mad here.
    i'm mad. you're mad."
    "how do you know i'm mad?" said Alice.
    "you must be," said the Cat, "or you wouldn't have come here."
    Alice didn't think that proved it at all;
    however, she went on "and how do you know that you're mad?"
    "to begin with," said the Cat, "a dog's not mad. you grant that?"
    "i suppose so," said Alice.
    "well, then," the Cat went on, "you see, a dog growls when it's angry, and wags its tail when it's pleased.
    Now I growl when I'm pleased, and wag my tail when I'm angry. Therefore I'm mad.."
  • but why is the rum gone?!
  • ***triggering!! don't look!!!*** (you looked..)
  • beezorch daddy-o! go! kitty, go!
  • ffft! hiss! spit! rah! kill! maim!
  • crank up your speakers!!

little friends..

Danradpic
back in the day ~
back when i was still a snowballinhell, including tabitha's kittens & little daniel..
copyright 2008 all rights reserved

friendlyghost fun & games!!

ghostfilms

Ghost
lost hollow digital art album ~
~ copyright 2008 all rights reserved

haunts

  • lunacy..
    CURRENT MOON
  • the happy haunts have received your sympathetic vibrations...

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