we might be crooked now..

graves & the infinite arm/
dig yourself a hole throw your asthma in
throw the toys in after.. cover them with earth
dig another hole and throw your conscience in
drop your hiccups down
and arrange them well
dig a deeper hole and bury all those words
bury all the fangs that they bared last night
dig another one and put yourself inside
and just close your eyes.. it's comfortable
crawling through the house in the darkness 
'cause i'm looking for a blanket
yeah i've got another hole to fill now
gotta keep them going
gather clothes and books and photos
gather anything of value
and i'll cover them with dirt and compost
make a place to lay my head
no light in this room
just the glow
from the oven
and the screech of
their laughter is all
that you can hear
if you just close your eyes
(you can pretend it's heaven)
we might be crooked now
but we're even when we grow
if you catch yourself drifting
if your feet leave the ground
wrap your arms around a lamppost
or just drift until you're found
if you could see me now
you'd laugh yourself to stitches
we might be crooked now
but it doesn't matter what we show
because we'll be even when we grow... 

Comments

[ghost]

i'm nosferatu now at 403 years old..
kind of a sad bday..
my guys are out seeing the hellboy movie & i'm just here by my lonesome..
nobody loves me.
ghost & toxic

p.s. update:
ok so i sent a message to ben cooper since he's one of my myspace friends asking him a lyrics question to the song i posted.. and he wrote me such a nice note right back with the correct lyrics!!!! this made my day!
so these are absolutely correct!
:D

[thumper]

hey ghost, you ok. posted on board but its v quiet, the others are away.
hope you not in mirgrain hell. did you speak to sleepflower on her blog? i miss her alot.
speak to you soon.thumper X

[ghost]

i talked to sf on her blog a couple weeks back.. she seemed fine.. yeah the board's so quiet.. wish we had somewhere to link to others who could benefit..

no migraine hell..
depression hell i guess..
feel like letting myself fall into a well..

in lighter news, randy the editor of the boarder site http://www.skateandannoy.com wrote me asking for some gumby pix.. he'll be posting 'em up there soon.. that'll be kool.

ghost

[thumper]

hey ghost, does she not want to come back to see us, does that mean shes ok with everything and in a happy place now. can you tell her i send her a PM just to hi. its raining's birthday today, left a message on board for her. shes been quite quiet too, just hope their all ok. hugs to you ghost hope depression easies soon and great about the piccys. thumper X

[ghost]

thumper,
when i talked to sleepflower she seemed to be doing good, said she'd come by the forum soon? i notice she's posting 'down the rabbit hole' (an si/ed support site/link here on my blog - look left) i used to go there but i have to kinda stay away from pro-ish si/ed sites these days.. but it is a good support site though..
ghost

[ghost]

the box of bees is done.. trapdoor down right..
(i used my own captured yellow jackets! no beneficial bees were harmed in the making of this installation.. :) )

[ghost]

latest news is tim burton is going to redo alice in wonderland with johnny depp as the mad hatter!!!
still undecided whether to do it with actors or cg/voices? although i prefer the first choice, undoubtedly he will choose the second and thrill disney with the merchandising possibilities! think of the toys/games!!!
i may have to make a trip home when it comes out and buy another hatter tophat at disneyland for my collection?
my favorite hatter was played by peter cook in the early b&w victorian style bbc production..
he seemed quite happily insane to me.. :D
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GrTfEk2P9nw
wish someone had youtubed the trial scene..
ghost

[thumper]

hey ghost, sorry your in migraine hell again. your bee boxes are brill. such a great idea. im still ill, just cant shake it. see you over on the board once your feeling up to it. hugs thumper X

[ghost]

sorry you are still sick :(
hope your son stays well? i've decided to start naming my migraines the way they do hurricanes.. this one's ariel (thanks, sylvia!) :o

i've become so ocd it's sad.. was watching a tv show recently about how howard hughes' injury in a plane crash caused damage to the frontal area of his brain that controls 'error detection' and set off his voracious ocd.. geez, although with me it just runs in my family (me, my son, sisters, etc..) it is the same thing.. error detection malfunction driving me outta my mind because i can't take my pain meds without freaking out over and over.. i can't trust anything! :(
i need help man..
god how i need help..
but not drugs.
if i'm gonna be sick anyway i figure i choose my own disease.. not some drugs to bandaid/mask/hide the problem and manage me out of existence.. hehe..
healing would be great!
but haha.. no one is selling that..
besides, i'm too broke now in every way.
one unhappy ghost

[thumper]

hey ghost, :(
great name for a migraine, Ariel, is one of the archangels and is the over seer of nature.
the pain of a migraine is hell, sorry you dont trust anything to make it better. sending a huge hug, wrapped in a faux fur blanket.
thumper X

[ghost]

thanks,
i thought ariel was going to be nice? haha..
day 10 and the worst she has been..
that's it i'm throwing all her stuff out on the front lawn..
get outta my head, beast!
:/

[ghost]

after tylenol and a hot cloth on my head and a wasted weekend (not the good kind.. hehe..) ariel had finally gone..
and then i had to lean way down to retrieve one of our kitties from under the china cabinet and i felt her slam right back into my left temple with a vengeance and start all over!!!!!!!!!!!

but now at last after 10 days she seems to be gone finally.. hopefully..
*looks around furtively*

sh! don't tell her you saw me..
http://www.brensgumbyland.com/images/horriblesounds.gif
ghost

[ghost]

tmj/tmd has made my teeth so sensitive to hot/cold/pressure/air.. i have bought like 5 different toothbrushes trying to get a soft one and now am having to use a child's 'hello kitty' one.. haha.. toxic picked it out..
and rather than a nightguard for when i'm sleeping i actually bought a cheap glow-in-the-dark blue pacifier/binky just like the ravers use since ecstasy causes bad tmj too..
(it'll probably just fall out and end up covered in cat hair, but i'll try anything to ease this agony.. i can barely eat/drink these days..)
:(

ghost/toxic

[ghost]

venturing out into the world proved too much for a shut-in like me.. despite opening doors with tissues i got infected out in the germpool.. now i'm stuck in my cumfy chair sick playing morrowind..

but not before putting up pix of our latest hike & baby raccons! see album up left..

souptime..
ghost

p.s.
our halloween store opened & toxic has already done her shopping :D

[ghost]

i'm still sick sick sick.

i'd fling myself off the wagon though for a bottle of this:

http://www.wweek.com/portland/blog-7250-happy_daze_are_here_again_integrity_spirits_releases_trillium_absinthe_supeacuterieure.html

lovely name.. i've been up to trillium lake and it's perfect.

ghost

[ghost]

http://www.brensgumbyland.com/images/18pandasback.jpg
http://www.brensgumbyland.com/images/18pandas.jpg

found in an old journal.. lol

[ghost]

man.. just when i thought the plague was leaving me my lungs started closing up and i can't breathe..
:(
my son caught it too..
probably from sharing the game controller.. hehe..
now i've got migraine 'callalily' on top too.. 'bastet' was nice to me and only lasted 2 days, so i'm hoping i'll catch a break this time too? (2 days so far and kinda weak..)

so i completed the vampire quests in morrowind and took the cure since i could not trade/train or speak to others or go out in daylight at all.. so now i've sold all my plunder and i'm filthy rich.. enchanted some good weapons and named them:

splintered lament - an adamantine shortsword with lightning/shock power..

bleed for me - a very brutal little jagged metallic red daedric dagger.. one slash leaves a kind of blood cloud!

IT BURNSSS! - a very powerful daedric staff that does flame damage..

haematomania - a very sharp poison daedric tanto..

such a beautiful autumn day.. wish i could be out in it driving all day to pretty places, but being sick & with the cost of gas.. we're broke.. :/

..back to morrowind

ghost

[ghost]

i need help
http://www.adconnection.proboards.com/index.cgi?board=snowcave&action=display&thread=279&page=4

[ghost]

h e l p

after a week of migraine callalily being a wimp and only hitting me a.m.s at about a 2 (on my migraine scale of 1-10) she swooped in first thing this a.m. and stayed up near level 8 aLL DAy!!! whimper..
and beat the living hell outta me..
dear god. need better drugs.
still anxious as hell..
helpehlphelphelphelphelphelphelphelphelpehHEILPHELPhelphelphelpeheohoeh;eohfoeh;ejkahjdg;lakjsg;oiajhg;k.. .

g ho st

[ghost]

http://www.brensgumbyland.com/images/fall.png
- ghost

http://www.brensgumbyland.com/images/twoheads.jpg
- t oX ic

[toxic]

halloween is coming!
http://www.adconnection.proboards.com/index.cgi?board=chat&action=display&thread=354

toxic